Of respect and cleanliness

This post has been some time in the making. But only in my mind. It's like when you think of writing something, but you don't have enough time at the moment or you aren't in front of the computer. So you shelve the idea for next time, and the next time just gets bumped along to another next time...

When I was in 2nd year, there was a Vietnamese guy in my class called Tu. It was pronounced "toe", and for some reason (which I never quite understood) the French in my class were highly amused by this. Every time his name was mentioned, they started making "toe" sounds, like "toe, toe, toe" with a tone that sounded like "toink toink toink" (at least that's how it seemed to me...I have no idea what they meant it to be)

As for me, I found it highly disrespectful. I mean, you're making fun of someone's name, for goodness' sake! I don't know whether Tu felt that way, because he never said anything about it and kept a smile on his face at the joke, but I believe he looked a little exasperated sometimes.

Once I mentioned to one of the guys (who did that "toe toe" thing quite often) whether he didn't feel that Tu could be offended by their joking around with his name. He seemed astonished by the thought of it...he said "I like Tu a lot!" Which I suppose meant that he wasn't trying to offend. But that doesn't keep Tu from being offended, if you know what I mean.

On another note, a few months earlier I had asked a few French friends over and made kuih kodok. While passing the plate of kuih around, I moved some of them with my fingers to push the hotter ones aside. As I did that I noticed Albin looking at me curiously... I didn't really understand why until later, when Céline picked up a hot (just fried) piece of kuih and almost dropped it...I told her to put it back and take another one instead, but she replied, "I can't put it back, I've touched it!" I was like... "Er...okay." -_-

Anyway that gave me a little food for thought and I came to the conclusion that the French only touch food that they're going to eat themselves because THEY LICK THEIR FINGERS TO CLEAN THEM.

Which I am going to have to explain as well. I'm not sure whether it's the same for everyone, but for me saliva is dirty. I think it is what I've been taught. You do not put your fingers in your mouth. If you eat and then you lick your fingers, you wash them afterwards. I think that's generally the case in Malaysia (correct me if I'm wrong). But the French will lick their fingers after they've eaten chips, or chocolate, or something. Just so that there's no more food (like salt) left on the finger. And after that they're good to touch whatever else.

Except other people's food. So maybe they feel that saliva isn't dirty, you just have to keep yours to yourself.

I used to be surprised when I was the only one going off to wash my hands, or looking for a tissue paper to wipe my hands after sharing a snack. But now...I just try to be discreet about it.

Another "event" that kinda illustrates this was during the fêtes consulaires in Lyon. There was food prepared for the booth visitors to try, and one of them was kuih ketayap. (it's a green pandan roll with coconut filling) We cut it into pieces to place on the tray for people to try them, and one of those who came from Paris (from Tourism Malaysia) mentioned that we were supposed to use gloves. She said that in Paris, if we didn't use gloves no one would touch the food!

(If anyone has an explanation for this "strange" behaviour, let me know...)